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Sitting in Judgement
Tips To Understanding Judgement In Feedback
(The Three Aspects of Feedback - Part 3)
by Eric Winger, DTM
“I judge people,” Coaching can be Turned into Judgement
said no one ever. —Despite our best efforts at being non-judge-
mental, the listener may hear judgement because
We like to think of low self esteem and misunderstandings. This
of ourselves as can help explain why people react negatively
objective, rational, to seemingly helpful feedback. Don’t assume,
and non-judgemental observers. We’re not. however, that the listener is wrong. Sometimes
Instead, we label. We categorize. We show bias. we don’t even know we judge.
We compare. Yes, we judge.
Sometimes that judgement can be valuable. If In Doubt Leave It Out—If you are unsure
Often, it can be destructive. Understanding that your judgement is wanted, leave it out. It’s
judgement is key to
its effective use in our ok to help someone
feedback. with a contest speech
Judgement even if you don’t
Is Comparison1— think it will win.
Simplistically put, Instead, focus on
judgement is a appreciation and
comparison. It’s a coaching. Although
comparison between judgement may
where someone is and be a part of good
where they are going. feedback, the goal
It’s a comparison between people. It’s a compar- of feedback is not
ison between the reality and the ideal. If your to judge but to help. Judgements are powerful.
feedback is comparative, it may be judgement. They can be a force for good by motivating effort
Judgement can be Useful—When someone towards a goal. Or, they can be destructive in the
wants to know their status in relationship to a implications. By understanding our instinct to
goal, judgement can be useful. For example, in label and compare, we can use judgement for
Toastmasters speech competitions competi- better feedback.
tors want to know how they rank compared to This concludes a series on the three aspects
other speakers. Judgement can also be used by of feedback - appreciation, coaching, and judge-
employees to learn what they have to do to get ment. Understanding and knowing when to use
that next promotion. all three is not only beneficial to those whom
Judgement can be Destructive—“That’s we give feedback, but can help us avoid many
awful,” said too many Reality TV judges. “You’ll difficult situations.
never be good at that,” said too many parents. 1From the book, Thanks for the Feedback,
“The speech really needs improvement,” said by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen. They
too many Toastmasters. We’ve all felt the sting use the term “Evaluation.” I replaced that
of cruel judgements and they can hurt. with “Judgement” to avoid confusion with
Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged—If you judge, Toastmasters evaluations.
be prepared to be judged. People have their own Eric Winger joined Toastmasters in 2009. He is
ideas about where they rank and if your judge- a member of Feedbackers and Silicon Forest where he
ment doesn’t align with theirs, you will certainly serves as VP Membership.
be told. That doesn’t mean your judgement was
wrong but it does remind us that judgement is
more opinion than fact.
30 Volume 3 Issue 4 - OCTOBER 2016
